Eden's Acres

This has been a frustrating week, still trying to understand why lenders refuse to finance the property without having any logical reason. The value is there, with 10 acres, two nearly new triple-wide, 2,500 square foot manufactured homes, and a slew of 3-year-old outbuildings. If there was one home at this same price, we could get a mortgage. Just adding the second home makes the property “ineligible.” But why???

I rely a lot on my intuition, and Joe laughs at my tendency to look for “signs” that something is right or wrong. He thinks the situation is hopeless, and I should read the “signs” that getting turned down eight times ought to tell anyone it’s not “meant to be”. But then I contradict myself and say that “if it’s meant to be, it’s up to me”, another of my favorite sayings, another version of “God helps those who help themselves.” I’m not ready to let it go just yet. Didn’t Thomas Paine say, “the harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph”?

We continue to look at properties daily. Not much new is coming on the market; darn this pandemic! At a time when we most want to get out of the city and find not just peace and comfort in the country, but the safety of a lower risk environment, the country folk are hunkered down and not budging. But the clock is ticking; Joe has to be out of his house in three weeks, and I had planned to give my two-months notice on my rental next week. At least we have that flexibility, but we’re all getting impatient to begin the new life, not move into limbo.

I have been researching properties whose owners might be considering selling, but are not currently on the market. I’m looking into farm loans. We’re investigating whether we can subdivide the property in two so that each half has just one home, if that will help. I’m disappointed by the fact that of the countless mortgage lenders we’ve talked to, not a single one has had the initiative to look for or offer any alternate solutions, to try to be creative or resourceful.

On the positive side, we did form the LLC on Joe’s birthday last week, so Eden’s Acres is official! And I am concentrating on positive visualization, laying out the tracts on the property for trees, gardens, animals, recreation, events. Meditating on attracting abundance. Working on the business plan and product development. Yesterday was Father’s Day, so at our weekly Sunday Dinner we all asked our beloved Papa Joe in heaven to pull some strings. He grew up in the city, and his move to the suburbs when we were born was a major life change for him. “All I knew was concrete,” he used to say, but he discovered that he loved to garden, and his tomatoes and peppers became his favorite crops. He would so love this property, as would our mom. They would be parked on that screen porch day and night, soaking up the peace and quiet and the beauty of nature.

We still carry their ashes with us in two separate urns, with half of of them in each…16 years now. I left my urn with Joe a couple of years ago, I want them to be together completely, he’s not ready to let them go to the earth. But in Eden’s Acres we can all find a home together, where they can rest at peace, and when our times come we can join them in our angel garden. It’s how they always meant it to be.

It’s up to me…

No one may yet be reading this blog, but the universe and God are aware that I skipped last week, when I had so much to be thankful for! Just days after the first blog post, Joe’s home sold! The family toured in the morning, made an offer and in less than a day had a signed contract. We were so excited and grateful, feeling blessed and full of hope.

We looked at a property that we didn’t think would make the cut, but it was close to home so worth the short drive. As always, Jake fell in love with it…strange layout of the house, with a small kitchen (not working for me!) 1600 square foot master bedroom that had a fireplace, but only a tiny bathroom with small shower stall. What he loved most (and what Joe and I disliked most) was the huge in-ground pool in the middle of the house, with a built-in bar, hot tub and lots of entertaining space. We all loved the barn and the huge workshop, but the house was too odd, in disrepair, and asking an outrageous price.

But now that we had a signed contract, and buyers who wanted to close within six weeks, we had to get really serious about finding a place. Joe and I drove two hours through a tropical storm to view another property in Live Oak that has two well-appointed manufactured homes on 10 acres, each is 4/3 with 2,500 square foot and has the requisite bonus room for their “man cave”. It also has a separate concrete and steel three-bay garage, and a one-bay one, plus a beautiful 4-stall horse barn with covered training area. The property is fenced and on a paved road less than 10 minutes off the interstate. The buildings are all only three years old and the price is just perfect! We were sure we had our farm, and the drive home flew by as we discussed our plans.

Our elation faded when we discovered no lender would finance a property with two manufactured homes. One site-built and one manufactured, fine. Two site-built, fine. But two equal sized manufactured homes — even as new and luxurious as they both are — no dice. It makes no sense whatsoever, and no one will give us a reason except to say “it’s not in the guidelines”. We have been through five lenders so far, have one last shot. Joe’s credit is excellent, no one has issue with that, it’s only the property. If the last one says no today, we’ll ask the seller if they will finance, as they apparently won’t have any other options to sell it apart from an all-cash deal, which isn’t as likely in this market and price point.

We have a back-up property we’re going to see on Friday in another city. We also think it’s worth going back to the other property we all loved that came off the market because of the pandemic, see if they are ready to sell. And I will get back to work researching homes with owners who might be thinking of selling, but not yet gone to market. This is the week we will find our farm. Tomorrow is Joe’s birthday and we then have only 30 days before they need to vacate their house. We are ready and open to take ownership of the property that is meant for us!

Last Saturday I woke up to a stunning sunrise on the beach, the breeze cool enough that I needed a sweater to venture out for a stroll. Only a few solitary souls were out, but after a couple months of “sheltering at home” this was a common sight. I sat on the sand and studied the gently rolling waves lap the shore. This is 60, I thought. I have sat on this very spot on this very beach countless times over the decades, never really thinking about the concept of time running out. But my beloved mother was diagnosed with leukemia at 62 and was gone by 65, far too soon, leaving an emptiness that could never be filled. Her mother – who had been told that because of her scarlet fever as a child she would be too frail to have children – gave birth to six of them, lived to see all 14 of her grandchildren born, but died at 64. I’m healthy and feel fine, but the spectre of the 60s still looms large, and makes me wonder.

And so I decided it was time to get serious about living.

For years now I have had a dream of simplifying my life. I grew up in a small town, and loved having all of our family nearby, dropping in often for dinner, coffee and cake, to play cards or swim or just visit. Summers were a montage of family picnics, long drives to nowhere, waking up in some relative’s house because we were having too much fun to go home to our own. I dreamt of having a large farm property where my son could pursue his passion for the green outdoors, where my daughter could indulge her love of hospitality as an event planner, where we could all live together in quiet harmony.

But it was just a dream. I felt stuck in a series of jobs with endless hours and stress with no money. There was always family drama and I was always taking care of someone.

A few months ago it was coming to a head. My blood pressure was out of control, and I was tired of trying new medicines and always feeling tired and stressed. I worried constantly about my 23-year-old son and his fast track to nowhere. He has his own lawn maintenance company, and I’m very proud of his initiative and drive, but because of his ADHD he operates on a day-to-day basis, with no planning, organization or budgeting. When his landlord sold the rental house he was living in out from under him, it was nearly impossible for him to find another place to live. He had no W-2 to prove his income, he spent every dime he earned so had no savings to pay a deposit. He moved in with my brother, who had recently been divorced, and who had never had children of his own; he had a much nicer house and it was more fun than living with boring old mom. But the two of them then lived the party life, with no thought of tomorrow. The stress and worry about them was not helping my own health.

My farm dream was resurrected, and the three of us had a serious discussion. I was happy to discover that they were also more than ready for a change. They felt their lives lacked direction and focus and purpose. We realized we all have different strengths and gifts, and that by working together we could all find the true purpose and satisfaction our lives were lacking. And so Eden’s Acres was born.

It would be a farm, where Jake could pursue his love of the green outdoors. He had worked for years doing installations of plants and trees for a local landscaper, who had been a wonderful mentor to him and was teaching him the business. He had also had a brief gig on a farm and fell in love with the lifestyle, the animals, the growing. My brother Joe works as a remote employee in IT, so he could work from anywhere, and he’s the one who had the stable job that would enable us to finance the dream. He too missed our small town roots and the joys of a full house and family gatherings. My “earth mother” instincts were pulling me to nurture, and there would be no better place than a farm, with a garden to grow, family to feed, and opportunities to pursue my creativity and be self-sustaining. We call it Eden’s Acres because it is God’s land of plenty, the home that would nourish our souls and bring us the peace we all crave.

We want at least 10 acres, with a preference of land that would also allow us to delve into agritourism, with barn weddings and other events and activities – that’s the event planner in me. A house large enough for all of us to have privacy and space, with extra room for frequent visits from family and friends. A small town we could get involved in, but not more than two hours from our current home in Jacksonville so we still have city ties.

We have spent many weekends traveling to nearby small towns to look at countless possibilities. Great house, not-so-great property. Gorgeous property, small house. We found a house and property we all fell in love with…but the pandemic hit and the owners took it off the market. And Joe’s home, the basis for our ability to finance the dream, is still on the market, not generating the interest we were so sure it would. We felt stuck.

And then I had a dream that felt so real I knew it had to be God whispering in my ear. In this dream, a man had found out about our property search and reached out to us. He was terminally ill, and the last in his family, without anyone to care for him. He was no longer able to take care of the property that had been in his family for two generations. He said that if we would allow him to continue to live in the house with him, and help to take care of him, he would sell us the property, teach us what he could about the farming and the animals. He needed the money to help pay his medical bills, and someone to manage his day-to-day care, and he wanted to know someone would love and respect his family’s home and give it the care it deserved. I had been the caregiver for my parents and others, and while I don’t have medical training, I have an abundance of compassion and love, and all of us were eager to help. It was truly an answer to all of our prayers.

Even after I woke, this dream stayed with me, for days and weeks. We continued to search for properties, but with the pandemic, more and more possibilities were being taken off the market. And then on that beach on my 60th birthday, it occurred to me that the only way that dream could come true was if people did know about our search for property, and me telling the handful of people I had told was not going to be enough. It was time to reach out to a larger audience.

And thus this blog was born. Part of our plan had been to document our journey during this process, but the original thought was a video blog from Jake, sharing what it’s like for a young man in his 20s to live the Small Farm Life in the 20s – SFL 20/20. We thought we’d begin once we had a property and the real work got underway, but it makes sense that starting now may help us find that property.

And so we invite you to join us as we embark on our modern American Dream and the search for our own Eden’s Acres. If you have ideas, we’d love to hear them!

Michelle, Joe and Jake